To Dog or To Human

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel , he planned to visit on his vacation.

He wrote:

"I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved.

Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "I've been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I've never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. I've never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I've never had a dog run out on a hotel bill.

Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel.

And, if your dog will vouch for you, you're welcome to stay here, too."

Smaaaart Barber

Sarkari Nai (Barber) ne baal kaat-te waqt Kapil Sibbal se poochha - Saab ye

Swiss bank wala kya lafda hai ?

Kapil Sibbal shouted - Abey tu baal kaat raha hai ya inquiry kar raha hai ?

Nai ( Barber)- Sorry saab aise hi poochh liya.

Agle din Pranab Mukerji se bal Kaat-ke waqt poojha - Saab ye kala dhan kya

hota hai ?

Pranab shouted - Tum humse ye sawaal q poochha ?

Nai - Sorry saab bas aise hi poochha liya.

Next day CBI interrogated the Nai - Are u an agent of Baba Ramdev ?

Nai - Nahi saab ji.

CBI - Kya tum Anna k agent ho ?

Nai - Nahi saab ji.

CBI - To tum baal kat-te waqt Congressi netaon se faltu k sawaal q karte ho?

Naayi - Saab na jane q Swiss bank aur kale dhan k naam par in Congress wale ke baal khade ho jate hain aur mujhko baal kaatne me aasani ho jati hai , isliye poochhta rehta hoon.

Heaven & Hell

A holy man was having a conversation with God one day and said,

' God , I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.'

God led the holy man to two doors.

He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in.

In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew, which smelled delicious and made the holy man's mouth water.

The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to be famished.

They were holding spoons with very long handles, that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful.

But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths.

The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.

God said, 'You have seen Hell.'

They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one.

There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water.

The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking. The holy man said, 'I don't understand..'

It is simple,' said God . 'It requires but one skill.

You see they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only of themselves.'

Marriage

You Start with year One; and boy she's a sweet bun full of fun.

Two year in it Dude; life could'nt be more good.

Four years on; she says it all n u dont go on.

You are onto Six; n she says a peg is too much of a Fix.

Seven year Itch; u find life is nuthin but a Bitch.

Ten year Run; life aint no more Fun.

You git on the eleventh year; you lose your things that are so dear.

And when you touch yer Twenty; you are the wise counsel to a plenty.

For 25 years you Slog; your just another Old Stupid Dog.

Motivation

There was a farmer who collected horses; One day a horse became very ill so he called the veterinarian.

The vet said:

Well, your horse has a virus. We'll give him this medicine for three days. If on the 3rd day and if he's not better, we're going to have to put him down.

Standing nearby, the pig listened closely to their conversation, and approached the Horse and he wanted to motivate the Horse.

The pig said:

- Be strong, my friend. Get up or else they're going to put you to sleep! The Horse heard it, but did not make an attempt.

On the second day, the Vet gave the horse the medicine .

The pig came back to the horse and said:

-Come on buddy, get up or else you're going to die! Come on, I'll help you get up. Let's go! One, two, three..., yet the horse did not move or even try to do so.

On the third day, the vet said:

- Unfortunately, we're going to have to put him down tomorrow, otherwise, the virus might spread and infect the other horses.

After they left, the pig approached the horse and said:

- Listen pal, it's now or never! Get up, come on! Have courage! Come on! Get up! Get up! The Horse slowly responded..

The Pig goaded the Horse and every step the Horse took to get up and every effort it made, the Pig prodded it much more. finally the Horse Stood up and started Trotting. The Pig Goaded it to run, and so did the Horse.

All of a sudden, the owner came back, and saw the horse running in the field and began shouting:

- It's a miracle! My horse is cured.

This deserves a party.

So that night they Killed the Pig and feasted on it, while the Horse was fed the best feed and groomed much more well, he was the Champion who had fought back.

Points for reflection:

This often happens in most of organizations’. Sometimes nobody truly knows who actually deserves the merit of success, or who's actually contributing the necessary support to make things happen.

Rumi's Ghazal #.838

Mevlana (moulana) Jalalluddin Rumi's sufi verses:

Ghazal #.838

if you pass your night ; and merge it with dawn for the sake of heart
what do you think will happen

if the entire world ; is covered with the blossoms you have labored to plant
what do you think will happen

if the elixir of life ; that has been hidden in the dark fills the desert and towns
what do you think will happen

if because of ; your generosity and love a few humans find their lives
what do you think will happen

if you pour an entire jar ; filled with joyous wine on the head of those already drunk
what do you think will happen

go my friend ; bestow your love even on your enemies
if you touch their hearts
what do you think will happen

The Art of Theft - FlexiTheif

BARCELONA: A flexible thief squeezed into a large suitcase and then emerged to plunder valuables from other bags while inside the luggage compartment of a Spanish airport bus, police say.

The thief had a partner who would buy a bus ticket and place the suitcase in a bus from Girona airportto Barcelona in northeastern Spain, police said in a statement late Tuesday.

"Once the trip began, he would get out of the suitcase, search for valuable objects and hide them in a smaller bag he carried with him," regional Catalan police said.

The thief would then get back into the suitcase, to be reclaimed by his partner at the end of the 90-minute trip.

Alerted by the repeated thefts, police inspected a suspicious bag on the bus on June 3 and opened it up. "They saw there was a man doubled up almost like a contortionist," the statement said.

The man had a mobile phone, a small bag and a sharp object to open zips and locks, police said. Officers boarded the bus and detained the man who had left the suitcase in the luggage compartment.

Source

A True Satyagrah: a tale not to be of a ramdev or a sri sri.

The Story of a True Hero, a True Satyagrah, not a Farce but a true Fast for a Righteous Cause. Unlike many others Swamis, who of late have clamored and attained their branding through various media campaigns and have been portrayed as the true saviors or freedom fighters and representatives of the Civil Society, a true hero, who fought till his last breath for a righteous cause, though not noticeable he be, he shall ever remain a Real Hero.

Source

NEW DELHI/DEHRADUN: Union environment minister Jairam Ramesh on Tuesday blamed the Uttarakhand government for the death of the seer of Haridwar-based Matri Sadan Ashram, Swami Nigamanand, who was on fast for nearly four months against quarrying in river Ganga. The minister also warned the mining mafia of strict action.

After battling for his life for 42 days at the ICU in Himalayan Institute of Medical Sciences (HIMS), Dehradun, the 35-year-old crusader for 'Save Ganga', Swami Nigamanand, died on Monday afternoon at 2.30 pm. The Swami was allegedly poisoned at a Haridwar district hospital by a section of land mafia for daring to oppose their activities.

Responding to the media queries about the Swami's death, Jairam Ramesh said he had sent a letter to Uttarakhand chief minister Ramesh Pokhriyal on January 6 last year, asking him to take steps to end illegal sand mining in the stretches of River Ganga at Haridwar. "I have spoken to the chief minister on a number of occasions that illegal mining is rampant in Uttarakhand... That illegal mining enjoys political patronage in the highest levels. Unfortunately, no action was coming from the state government over the last 15 or 16 months," he said.

"In view of the fact that the state government has demonstrated a continued reluctance to take action against illegal mining, I think, we will have no option but to invoke Section 5 of the Environment Protection Act and take action on our own." the minister warned.

Illegal stone quarrying and mining are rampant along the 80km Ganga stretch from Munni-Ki-Reti to Rishikesh in Tehri district and further to Laksar town in Haridwar.

The Save Ganga crusader, a seer at Haridwar's Matri Sadan Ashram, had been on a fast-unto-death since February 19. On April 27, officials shifted him to Haridwar district hospital as his condition deteriorated. But he refused to touch food. Nigamanand slipped into a coma on May 2. He was then rushed to HIMS where he was put on life support system.

Dr Vijay Verma, a close aide of Swami Nigamanand and president of Haridwar Citizen Council, alleged Swami Nigamanand suffered a heart attack at Haridwar district hospital after being injected poison by hospital staff, who worked in collusion with the land mafia.

On May 15, a Matri Sadan's functionary, Brahamchari Dayanand, lodged an FIR at Haridwar Kotwali naming a member of a stone-crusher association and a senior doctor for poisoning the Swami. Matri Sadan Ashram has accused the local police of succumbing to the pressure of mining lobby and dragging its feet to arrest those named in FIR. In view of these accusations, Haridwar district magistrate R Meenakshi Sundaram has said that an autopsy of the Swami would be conducted.

The Uttarakhand government had on December 10, 2010 banned quarrying and stone-crushing along the Ganga as the entire region is eco-sensitive. However, the association of stone-crushers in Haridwar managed to get a stay on the government order. On May 27, a two judge bench of the Uttarakhand HC vacated the stay on a special leave petition filed before it by Matri Sadan.

Just For Laughs - 04

An elderly gentleman had a serious hearing problem for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted with a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100% accurate.

The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, 'Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.'

The gentleman replied, 'Oh, I haven't told my family yet, I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!'

It's a wonderful World.

Packed with people of all ages, the Train started its journey. People going to their work, colleges, were awaiting for their stops to disembark and carry the day on. Seated near one of the Windows was an Old man and his 30 years or so aged, son. As the train moved, this 30 year old seemed overwhelmed with joy with every passing bit of scenery he saw. Jouyoulsy mentioning aloud to his father " Dad, did you see those Green Trees swaying with those winds, they are so beautiful, are'nt they? "

With every animal grazing around those lush green fields, and the brids flying high, as the train passed by, the son would, full of pride and joy say the same aloud and even clap his hands like a little child. This behavior went on for sometime, and people around were becomming a little perturbed by such a behavior of a grown up man. Tensed as they were about something or the other, most of the co-passengers of this Father and Son, said many things about the Son's behavior. Some were so irritated that they even told the Father of the 30 yeard old to ask him to keep his voice low. Some thought that he maybe insane or might be mentally disturbed.

Suddenly it started raining. and as the rain drops sprayed on the travelers through the open window, the 30 years old, filled with much joy, said to his father " Dad I could so far smell the ground when it rained, feel the wind in my hair and my hands, hear these people talking and moving about, but today i can see everything and all of these beautiful faces, and now i really know why they call this a wonderful world".

The 30 years old had been born blind, and had just got his vision back thanks to some donor, and this was his first day of re-birth into this wonderful world.

So at times, we may not know why or how a person feels as he talks or reacts, everyday is a re-birth for all, and dont be rude or hate anyone. None asked you to love or hate the other, so Live your life to the fullest, you may not wake up to see tomorrow.

Some Interesting Facts.

Q: Why do men's clothes have buttons on the right while women's clothes have buttons on the left?
A: When buttons were invented, they were very expensive and worn primarily by the rich. Since most people are right-handed, it is easier to push buttons on the right through holes on the left. Because wealthy women were dressed by maids, dressmakers put the buttons on the maid's right! And that's where women's buttons have remained since.

Q: Why do ships and aircraft use 'mayday' as their call for help?
A: This comes from the French word m'aidez -meaning 'help me' -- and is pronounced, approximately, 'mayday.'

Q: Why are zero scores in tennis called 'love'?
A: In France , where tennis became popular, round zero on the scoreboard looked like an egg and was called 'l'oeuf,' which is French for 'egg.' When tennis was introduced in the US , Americans (mis)pronounced it 'love.'

Q. Why do X's at the end of a letter signify kisses?
A: In the Middle Ages, when many people were unable to read or write, documents were often signed using an X. Kissing the X represented an oath to fulfill obligations specified in the document. The X and the kiss eventually became synonymous.

Q: Why is shifting responsibility to someone else called 'passing the buck'?
A: In card games, it was once customary to pass an item, called a buck, from player to player to indicate whose turn it was to deal. If a player did not wish to assume the responsibility of dealing,he would 'pass the buck' to the next player.

Q: Why do people clink their glasses before drinking a toast?
A: It used to be common for someone to try to kill an enemy by offering him a poisoned drink. To prove to a guest that a drink was safe, it became customary for a guest to pour a small amount of his drink into the glass of the host. Both men would drink it simultaneously. When a guest trusted his host, he would only touch or clink the host's glass with his own.

Q: Why are people in the public eye said to be 'in the limelight'?
A:Invented in 1825,limelight was used in lighthouses and theatres by burning a cylinder of lime which produced a brilliant light. In the theatre,a performer 'in the limelight' was the centre of attention.

Q: Why is someone who is feeling great 'on cloud nine'?
A: Types of clouds are numbered according to the altitudes they attain, with nine being the highest cloud If someone is said to be on cloud nine, that person is floating well above worldly cares.

Q: In golf, where did the term 'Caddie' come from?
A. When Mary Queen of Scots went to France as a young girl,Louis, King of France , learned that she loved the Scots game 'golf.' So he had the first course outside of Scotland built for her enjoyment. To make sure she was properly chaperoned (and guarded) while she played, Louis hired cadets from a military school to accompany her. Mary liked this a lot and when returned to Scotland (not a very good idea in the long run), she took the practice with her. In French, the word cadet is pronounced 'ca-day' and the Scots changed it into 'caddie.

Q: Why are many coin banks shaped like pigs?
A: Long ago, dishes and cookware in Europe were made of a dense orange clay called 'pygg'. When people saved coins in jars made of this clay, the jars became known as 'pygg banks.' When an English potter misunderstood the word, he made a container that resembled a pig. And it caught on.

Q: Did you ever wonder why dimes, quarters and half dollars have notches (milling), while pennies and nickels do not?
A: The US Mint began putting notches on the edges of coins containing gold and silver to discourage holders from shaving off small quantities of the precious metals. Dimes, quarters and half dollars are notched because they used to contain silver. Pennies and nickels aren't notched because the metals they contain are not valuable enough to shave.


So there ! Now you know !

Just For Laughs - 03

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get his half yearly physical Examination.

A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?'

Morris replied, 'Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.''

The doctor said, 'I didn't say that... I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful.'

Just for Laughs - 02

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.

The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?'

'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'

Basic Military Laws - Just for Laughs

• Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.
• Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
• Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
• Five second fuses always burn three seconds.
• The easy way is always mined.
• Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
• If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
• Incoming fire has the right of way.
• No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
• No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
• If the enemy is within range, so are you.
• The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
• Tracers work both ways.
• Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
• Military Intelligence is a Contradiction.
• Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
• When in doubt, empty your magazine.
• The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
• Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.
• The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass.
• The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.
• The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
• If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything.
• To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
• The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the G-3.
• The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.
• The crucial round is a dud.
• There is no such place as a convenient foxhole.
• Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.
• Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the General is watching.
• Your bivouac for the night is the spot where you got tired of marching that day.
• Things that must be together to work can never be shipped together.
• The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.
• If you have a personality conflict with your superior: he has the personality, you have the conflict.
• If you enter CO's office with an idea, most likely, you will leave his office with the CO's idea.
ONLY WAY TO AVOID A BULLET IS TO RUN FASTER THAN A BULLET

Dog Nap

An old, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of. He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head. He then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep. An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out.

The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside and resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour. This continued off and on for several weeks. Curious I pinned a note to his collar: 'I would like to find out who the owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.'

The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his collar:

He lives in a home with non-stop chatting wife, 6 children, 2 under the age of 3 - he's trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?